Sunday, January 09, 2011

M Town

When I make a city, or commission one, or own one, or whatever, there are a few key things I will do. No streets becoming streets. It is not ok that a road is called Pacific on one side of town and Taylor on the other. Nor is it alright for Main to come to a dead-end and then continue to the left as Main and to the right as, say Herald. No. Main should dead-end, and then you can turn left or right onto Herald.

If I decide to use numbers for streets, it will be in a real grid, none of this squiggly business. Or those addresses that can't be gotten to by whichever up-and-down or side-to-side roads the driver fancies. And all the streets will be numbers. ALL OF THEM! Then a poor soul will not get lost looking for 7th north in between 620 N and State and wondering if he's gone too far, not far enough, or if State is, in fact, 7th north.

Tonight, it took me almost 2 hours to get somewhere from where I returned in 20 minutes. Now, I will admit, I am bad at directions. But I wouldn't have to be good at them if every street would just be what and where it was supposed to be.

So, do not fear, for someday, I will overcome the world, demolish every city, and redesign all roads so that no direction illiterate person like me will ever ever suffer ever ever again.

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